I have been requested for a barbeque weekend yesterday. After having roasted the other week’s “tusok – tusok na karne” on a pot of charcoal and ending up with a ruined pot that we can no longer use, I decided to scour the mall for something.

Initially, i was just looking for something that can be placed on top of the stove or better yet on top of a pot of burning charcoal. But as luck would come my way, i found this very adorable piece of technology:

Yes folks, portable barbeque grill in a box. I got a portable grill complete with its own charcoal that is ready to cook in just 10 minutes and you don’t have to exert effort to keep the flame. Plus, i got that for only Php 50. The original price would have been Php 149, but i got it on sale.

Sad that it is disposable, but it is by far the most convenient way to cook rosted food on a stick for people like me who have a small backyard.

It is rather sad that Baebidoodles has sprouted just 1/8 of her first tooth and still months or maybe years away from really appreciating Mommy’s home cooked meals, but I am taking the time to polish my craft at being a home maker and a mother.

Who knows, with practice, maybe by the time she starts eating real food, I may already be able to create an amazing array of adult food disguised as baby food.

I am far from being the well rounded person that I should be as a Wife and a Mother, but i am getting there!

Apparently, the feed me-care for me-look at me-cuddle me dependence of new borns gradually gives way to the little tots desire for locomotion and more independence to move about.

Time has been flying right before my eyes lately. It seems that Baebidoodles is growing faster than I am able to accept the fact that she is developing into her own person with unique traits and attitudes. I would love our little girl to be little forever and to enjoy our mushy hugs in the evening and the innocent smiles to my whispered reminders before she goes to bed.

8 Months Pregnant

At age 14, I was sweating my heart out exercising in secret just to be sure that no flab finds its way around my belly.

Last year, as I watched my belly extend beyond the limits of my imagination to accommodate a growing fetus that would kick only when Badoodles is around, I somehow forgot to be overly conscious about my expanding belly.

Although some occassional bastards sent me paranoid when they say that I have grown too fat, I seemed to enjoy watching it grow. For me, it was an assurance of a healthy baby that would soon turn my world upside down.

Then the D Day came on January 8. I went to the hospital armed with all the necessary things I could get to ensure that my belly returns to normal. I am not about to give up my life long achievement to the baby fats that will remain after pregnancy. I wore my belly binders for 4 months and would often tell Mama to tighten it when she helps me wear it. The tighter, the better – that was my principle – which should not be followed by New Moms and the Experienced ones alike!

Five months post pregnancy, i am still conditioning my body to return to my exercise routines, but I am still quite lazy to do it. I am not also allowed to diet while I am breastfeeding, but I am so thankful that my body has its own way of popping out the excess weight.

Our little girl is now moving about, kicking here and there, oftentimes her tiny hands would fly to my face and – man, it hurts! But it is the best part of being alive!

I enjoyed the entire nine months of my pregnancy. It was a bliss. It seems like all those months and the weight came and went, but with the passing of time, I am no longer watching my belly (as much as I did before).

My eyes are now on that little girl who is finding her way through life and is pretty much amused by what her hands and feet can do.

I love being a Mom. I love being Baebidoodles – human punching bag, blanket, feeding bottle, toy and everything that she wants me to be.

Best of all, I enjoy giving into her ‘childish kalokohan’ because she is just so cute when she starts being naughty.

I understand that the time for discipline does not start when she is old enough to tie her own shoe laces, but I have my way of instilling in her five month old mind the value of being a disciplined little person without making it too harsh and stripping her of the fun of being a child.

As much as possible, I would like her to grow up with many childhood memories of play and fun with her parents.

It would be my greatest pride and joy to send her out into the world with vast experiences that are filled with happy thoughts and the assurance that her family will be her shield, shelter and protection!

Given the unstable economy right now, a lot more people are
taking the risk and working from home. This is a dream that
people have now and again. They just never did anything about it
in the past because they had a stable job and they were not
willing to give up for an opportunity that may or may not pay
off. Nowadays, people’s jobs are not so stable anymore. This is
why so many people feel it is the right thing to do by taking
that risk. There are so many different opportunities available
online that virtually anyone can find a niche from home.

Working from home holds such an appeal with people because they
hear stories of people making several thousand dollars in one
day. With the chance of losing their once secure job looming
over their heads, now seems like the best time to take that
chance. This is not to say that you take your chance on the
first opportunity you find. You need to do your research and
find something that you actually could do, as well as like.
Putting all your effort and money into something you know
nothing about simply because you can make a lot of money does
not make any sense.

There are great opportunities you can find from working from
home. The smart way to go about it is by doing your homework and
not rushing into anything. Along with doing your research is
finding a program that has a training period with it. Even if
you are familiar with what you are doing, you are not familiar
with doing the job from home. You are used to having a boss tell
you what and when to do things. You have to get out of that
routine at home and realize that you have to be the one who
makes you work each day.

If working from home has always been in the back of your mind
but you never wanted to take the huge financial risk, now might
be the best time because of the economy. You see people around
you every day getting laid off. It only is a matter of time
until your name could get called. Having something in mind in
case that unfortunate day happens is a great idea. Now is the
best time for people to take risks because nothing is stable in
their lives.

There are so many advantages to working from home. You do have
to be structured with the time that is required to work, in
order to complete the jobs you need to do. One good thing about
that you can work the time of day that suits your schedule best.
You have plenty of time left over to spend with you family and
participate in their activities. You also save a lot of money by
not having to go into the office, unless you live very close to
work. Most people don’t.

About the Author: I am Norma Jean and in the process of
building me a work at home business. Did you enjoy the above
article? If you did please check out my Good Health Site.
Natural Beauty Products, Health Products for women & men.

http://www.Good-Health-Longer.com

Source: http://www.isnare.com
Permanent Link:

http://www.isnare.com/?aid=377051&ca=Family+Concerns

Being a Mommy has never been my cup of tea, but i am learning day by day.

I a previous post, long before i even got pregnant, i bravely announced that i will never – not in this lifetime admit to being a full time housewife.

But for the past four months – i became one!

Being Mommy for the first time is a cross between excitement when i see her smiling at everything i tell her and the exhaustion of spending the rest of your waking and sleeping hours attending to her needs.

Then came a blessing – we finally got ourselves a Nanny last April 15.

She is an angel and if possible, i will be keeping her for the rest of my life. Baebidoodles loves her and they go along quite well.

Now that we have a nanny for our little girl, it’s time Mommy gets back to business and start working again. But the dilemna is that i don’t want to leave my baby girl alone to the mercy of someone else and let her wait the whole day to see me again.

By some stroke of luck, i have been hired by an American Company to do some Virtual jobs to help promote their budding company.

I love what i am doing although i have just started last Thursday. Since i am not a very sociable person, this seems to be the perfect job for me because i do not have to leave the comfort of our home and my little bundle of joy.

In a close friend’s word who is also working homebased – this will probably be the type of job where i will be staying for good.

I am starting to get my act together – i am a working mom again without leaving my little girl to the care of a stranger.

This is shooting two birds in one stone – raising a baby without sacrificing my need to practice my profession.

Life is good – it always is!

Cheers to me for a life well lived.  Everything in my life seems to be going in the direction i have always envisioned it to be.

At 30… i have a responsible husband, a very adorable baby girl and a seemingly comfortable life.

For the past three months since our Baebidoodles was born, there has been a major turnaround with the way i live.  She has changed me for the better. It seems that i have more purpose in life now rather than the mindless day to day existence i used to live.

But for my Dad, that was not the case. He left his Urban Life in the rich streets of Caloocan City as a young boy who is thirsty for adventure and the desire to give his widowed mother a better life.

The province seemed to be the best option as there was a promising job waiting for him. Seeing that it would open doors to a better and brighter opportunity to give his mother a more confortable life as she moves toward old age, he packed his bags and filled them with his dreams.

It was not long before he eventually found a woman to marry and settled down to start a family of his own and a small business to support his daily finances.

It is in the span of thirty years that he built not only his own dreams, but he made ours come true.

This month, the youngest of his three children will be graduating from college. My brother’s graduation will also mark my parents graduation from trying to make ends meet amidst the financial crisis that is looming over all the powerful nations.

However, despite our family’s excitement and eager preparations for the graduation, my parents had to leave their fast paced life in the province and temporarily move in with us here in Manila.

Daddy has wild varicose veins that led him to being hospitalized twice in January and February and later referred to a Doctor here in Manila for a more extensive treatment.

Our poor graduate has to be left alone in the province to take care of himself with the promise that we will come home to watch him march toward that stage and to his dreams.

Perhaps, daddy’s health issue has opend the possibility for the opportunity that Mother and Son have been waiting for a very long time.

Mamang is 84 years old and Daddy is 56. So much has changed from the young man that left her house in the 70′s to the man that was sitting beside her.

I watched her caress her son as if he were a young boy that came home from a day’s play.  She watched him move as if she were staring at her new born.  Perhaps, she was filling the gap that she has missed for thirty long years.

She knew that we were there for only a few hours and that her beloved son will be walking out the door again in a matter of hours and only time will tell when their paths will cross again.

The smile i saw painted on the old woman’s face and the happiness radiating in her eyes were priceless.  I take pride in the thought that i was present in the eventful reunion of mother and son.

Daddy came home looking his best and watching him connect with old friends was like watching him during his younger years. He showed me the streets he used to walk on and relived the youth in him through stories of his activities and misfits as a young boy.

It was like morphing back to the 60′s and 70′s when he was at the prime of his youth and living his life in the Urban Streets of Caloocan City.

I have a more profound respect and appreciation for my Father’s family now more than i ever did before. They are the people i only knew by name and never got the chance to grow up with them, but when we are together, the gap that the years brought between us is put to rest and we connect like we have been together all out lives.

Now that Daddy and Mamang have already closed the gap of the years, i trust in the the words we left the Family Matriarch: Bye Ma, see you later!

And indeed we will be back and she will be seeing more of us and her beloved son whom she has been missing all her life.

Being a nutcase myself and a hardhead, i never really came to terms with what that meant.  So much like the same feeling i had at eight years old – wondering why my cousin had to get married and we had to deal with her husband all the time.  That frame of mind changed when i got married and understood how beautiful life is when you live everyday of your life with the person you love the most.

Mama has been my worst enemy while i was growing up.  She is a strict bull and has her way of getting things done the way she wants and not the way i want.  We clash often because of our conflicting ideologies.  I resorted to living far from home after college because i thought that was the best remedy for our head batting to end, but it did not.

While being my worst enemy, she is also my best friend and confidant.  Maybe i get enough of my share of pieces of advice that work wonders from her that i grew up never bothering to look for more stable best friends from my peers.  She has a unique wisdom that is distinctly her own.  Oftentimes, i find her answers to my questions ridiculous, but in the long run i end up following her anyway when i realize that she was right all along.

Being the eldest of the three children, we have a very queer bond that no matter how much stress she puts into my life sometimes, i still run to her for the wisdom and the peace her ideals bring into my life.

Tonight, i sit here wondering how much i resemble her ideals no matter how hard i try to stand in the crowd and make myself believe that i am a different person, away from the shadow of my mother.  But the truth is, no matter how hard i try to step away, the more i realize that i am every bit like her and in more ways than one, i would like to imbibe the same spirit and discipline that she firmly held on while rearing me and my siblings.

Along the way, our little princess may hate me – much like the love – hate relationship i have of my mother, but i pray that somehow at the end of the day she would come to realize that like my Mama, i only want what’s best for her.

It is not going to be an easy road out there.  Children nowadays are more prone to various influences.  When i think of the struggles my parents had to deal with while we were growing up, being a new mother scares the courage out of me. 

Rearing children, girls specially in the province is not an easy task.  It requires patience, dedication and a lot of faith to be able to guide a child in the right path.  I grew up in the province where life is more laid back and technology is more conservative, yet my parents exerted their utmost effort to ensure that we don’t go astray.

Now that it is my turn to be a Mother – a lot of questions are playing in my mind. 

Will i be able to bear the same wisdom and courage that i have seen in my mother and would i be able to surpass her unique wisdom that has been passed on to her by experience rather than the formal education that today’s society requires.

Being a mother afterall, is not an issue of academic degree or scholastic achievement, but the wisdom that comes from the heart. 

Yes, i appreciate my mother more than i ever did before.  Yet, it does not mean that we have transcended from our love – hate relationship.  I will still hate her for many reasons, yet at the end of the day – i love my mother for being the tough woman that she is and for the wisdom that she has passed on to me.  It will be the same kind of tough love that i will be imposing on to my young family.

Afterall, raising children is something that is not taught in school.  It comes with the experience we get from the way we were reared by our own parents particularly our mother who take on the task of being their children’s Best Friend and Enemy rolled into one.

Mama has been with me as early as 2 days before the D Day and has provided a very handy assistance with everything i needed from packing my hospital bag properly to helping me get a headstart on nursing my baby.

The first two weeks has been quite a breeze.  I had all the time in the world to be dependent and clingy on my mother like i have always been.  I have watched her single handedly take care of me and the baby with ease.

As i watched her, everything seemed easy.  She was able to cook meals on time, put the baby to sleep, watch tv, pamper me and all those sorts of things.  She was able to finish everything with no visible effort.

Then the unexpected….

My brother called Badoodles on a Monday morning.  My daddy is sick has has to be confined.  Mama had to return to the province and so I was left behind to take care of a two week old infant.

I will be fine, go on home and take care of Daddy – was my proud and confident assurance while she was getting her stuff ready.

In my mind, everything seemed easy…. i have seen her move from one chore to the other.  In my mind, I felt that if she was able to multi task, I can do better than that.

Reality can sometimes knock a hard head off a sturdy shoulder.  Everything seemed easy for my mother, but it took more than an effort for me.  I was alone with a two week old baby and a totally blank idea on how i would go about with the day to day responsibility of keeping my baby safe and helping my body to recover.

What seemed like an easy task while i watched my mother move from one chore to the other was a tremendous challenge that i had to face.  Then reality suddenly set in – I am officially a Mother and no longer Mama’s first born and Daddy’s Little Girl.  I now have a First Born and a little girl of my own whom i need to take care of.

There was a sudden feeling of fear and panic that enveloped me.  How am i to take care of this little angel on my own.  What kind of Mother am I going to be?  Mama has been my strong ally and worst enemy at the same time in all the years of my life, but despite our love – hate relationship, i have always been a Little Girl who is forever dependent on her for pieces of advice.

Watching her take care of Baebidoodles gives me the assurance that our Little One is in good hands and that the same set of values that has been my basis for being who i am today will be the same set that will be passed on to this little person.

However, with the past five days that i was left alone to immerse into the real deal of motherhood left me in a whirlwind of total lack of control over the day’s activities.  The first experience of being home alone with a two week old infant has taught me to let go of my obsession to be on top of every situation and just allow nature to take its course.

Motherhood is based on instinct… i remember from our Psychology lessons in College.  You don’t have to go through formal College education to be a Mother because when you are there, holding that sweet little thing – you will just know what to do.

Indeed, that is true.  And it is also true what Mama used to say – When you have a child, you lose all sense of control and balance.  The child takes over and you have no other recourse than to follow.

The past five days watched me go through the most challenging part of being human.  I had crackers, bread and water as my regular meal.  It is not because i am on diet, but because Baebidoodles does not want to be put down in her crib.  We had to go around the house with her in my arms from morning to evening. 

Washing soiled clothes was another sacrifice.  It takes me the entire day to finish washing a few pieces of clothes because everytime i put her down, she would cry and i would leave the clothes and rock her to sleep.

I spent all five days with tears and wishing that i would just have went home with Mama instead of being left alone with a child.  Everytime Badoodles would check on me, i would try so hard to pretend that everything is going well and that there is nothing to worry about.  The hardest part about pretending is when i know that he does not believe no matter how hard i try.

Finally, toward the end of the week, when my perineum is hurting like hell, i had to tell the truth…  A few more days of the same set up and i was sure to see my OB Gyne in the Operating Table, trying to re suture my still fresh wound.

I am not complaining and this is not Post Partum Depression.  It is just me, admitting to myself that sometimes – The Spirit is willing, but the body is weak.  This is the time to rest and take care of my body.  Carrying a human inside me for nine happy months can’t restore the same kind of health that i had pre pregnancy in just a few weeks.

I look at our little angel and i am just happy to have a beautiful person who now completes our little family.  Motherhood is another face of my life that i embrace with dignity and confidence.

Although i still have to be hypnotised in order for me to decide to give birth again – i will not trade my Baby’s smile for anything else in the world.  She is more precious than my own life.  Now i understand how my Mother would have felt when she had me.  Now i understand why i am loved more than my siblings. 

Because of last week’s humbling experience and the buckets of tears i cried in silence, i have learned to appreciate the value to letting nature take it’s toll and letting life flow without me trying to put everything in place just because i want to.  Sometimes, you just let things be and that will make you happy.

I finally stopped waiting and allowed nature to take its toll.  We decided that Badoodles will have to return to work last January 5 and file his paternity leave on January 8.

Still feeling the blessed state of pregnancy, my main concern in life last January 7 was that his leave might be consumed in waiting and when the time comes for the delivery, both of us will have to panic because he is in the office and i will have to call him home and risk the danger of him travelling home filled with anxiety.

But as fate has it, our Little Angel and nature has better plans.

I woke up to terrible back pain at 5:30AM of January 8.  Thinking that it is just one of those back pains i have been enduring for the past nine months, i went out of the room and started walking around the house, hoping that it will aid in easing the pain.

Then at 7:30AM as expected, Badoodles arrived home from the office from an overtime work the night before.  My back pain seemed to trigger more discomfort rather than eventually ease out like it used to.

At 830AM, I had a bloody show and i was in more pain than ever.  I was feeling all kinds of biological needs that does not seem to be working in my favor.  I had been in the bathroom for more times than i could count.  Sleeping was more difficult, with the contractions coming in every time i finally fall asleep.

Having read all the literature ever written in google about what to do when True Labor sets in, nothing seemed to be of help in time of my worst pain.  Walking could have helped, but even the simplest act of standing was a tremendous effort.

By lunch time, i was vomiting my heart out.  My Mama kept on telling me that it was all part of the entry into motherhood and the best advice she has ever given me on that day was when she said: “Push hard with your stomach rather than gathering the force from your upper body.”

At 2:00PM, the contractions were coming in more steadily and i just knew that we had to head for the hospital rather than wait for the end of the day and panic when things become more complicated.

It was a rainy January afternoon.  We left the house as casually as we always do.  With an umbrella on hand and our hospital bag, the three of us headed for the door and travelled to the hospital as if we were just going to the mall for a casual stroll.

By the time we arrived at the hospital, my contractions seemed to wear thin.  I was feeling more comfortable and the pain was no longer noticeable.  The emergency Staff Nurses and Ob Gynes were at our aid, carefully checking for my vital signs and recording every nitty gritty of information they can extract.

The next thing i knew, i was at the examination table being checked for dilation then I had to change into my hospital gown and a dextrose was administered by the Nurses.  Everything was so calm that it gave me the feeling of serenity, i even had the guts to joke around and allow them to explain what it is they are doing to me.

However, the case is different when i look over at my Husband and my Mother.  Anxiety and worry are printed all over their faces as they watched the nurses prepare me for the Labor Room.  As i was wheeled away in a stretcher, i managed to say goodbye to Badoodles who was very pale and worried.

Off i was  to the labor room and the rest is history.  My Ob Gyne is an angel.  She never left my side from the time she arrived to the time the procedure was over.  I would also like to thank all the hospital staff who were like a strong dose of anesthesia.  In time of extreme pain, it helped that the people around me were all like a strong dose of medicine that alleviated the anxiety and the waiting for the final hour.

At 11:20PM, our Little Angel was born.  48cm long and 6.8Lbs.  She looks more like her Daddy and a little like me.  She is 4 days old today and we are all happy about everything we see in her.  She embodies every mannerism and behavior that Badoodles and I see in each other and everytime we look at her, we just couldn’t help but smile and wonder at this wonderful creature that God has blessed our family with.

Life is a journey.  We have travelled for the past 8 years just as a couple and now that we are a family – life just couldn’t get any better!

Call me a nerd, manang or just a conservative freak, but mind you i would have loved to be a Mom earlier than expected. 

It is just that i have a Mother who threatens to separate my head from my body if i ever changed the course of life she has projected me to lead.

Looking back, that intense fear and respect for her idealisms has been the guiding force that kept me on tract throughout my growing years despite the fact that i have always been hard headed, free willed and independently making my own decisions whether or not my parents or the people around me approved of whatever it is i wanted to do with my life.

I am currently 33 weeks pregnant.  This is going to be the nth baby to be born in Badoodles family, but the first ever in mine.

Everyone is excited and infancitipating and blindly guessing who is the baby going to look like.

My Sister who is the most caucasian among the three of us is hoping that her first Pamangkin would have fair skin.  Never mind if the baby looks like anyone of us for as long as the skin is fair then she would admit it to be a Maguire otherwise, she will not be bringing home gifts when she comes for vacation next summer.

I enjoy watching every member of our family express their excitement and sheer joy at the blessing of having an addition to the family.  But what i look forward to the most is when the baby interacts with MyBebe as if they are able to communicate and truly understand each other.

Being a Daddy’s First Born myself, i couldn’t help but wonder if my own father was also as excited as my Badoodles when i was still in the womb.  I remember Mama telling me in high school that all the love and the first time experiences they underwent as parents is embodied in what i have become and as the eldest, i could claim a different kind of affection that is way different from the one they can provide for my Sister and Brother.

Naturally, that made my head swell so big it made me feel like i am the most important person in the world. Until i went to College, enrolled in Psychology and realized that the love a parent has for a child differs depending on a lot of factors.  My Professor once said: “You cannot give the same degree of love for every child.  You love them in different manners and for different reasons just because no two persons are exactly the same.”

One thing i regret about my growing up years is that sibling rivalry has been unconsciously wired in me and my sister’s brain.  We both grew up being compared by our Mother to someone else who is totally in a different league.  She was perpetually being compared to me because i could stay in one place for all of eternity because i was told to do so and i on the other hand would be compared to an older cousin who has always been a top achiever in class.

Now that we are both adults, we are desperately trying to shake off that stereotype that someone is always better and that we are in an endless contest of trying to convince ourselves and others that we are better and we can be our own person.

In a matter of 7 weeks, i will officially be a mother.  For the past eight months, i have been trying to figure out how on earth am i going to raise another person because the only way i know how to be a mother is through the examples i have seen in my own family.

Somehow, with the lessons i have stumbled upon through this life and the constant brainstorming with MyBebe about everything under the sun, i know i will be a Mother that my child would be proud of. 

Along the way, i vow to make a conscious effort to at all times be fair and just specially with matters that concern the child’s discipline and to never commit the mistake to reinforcing the evil of sibling rivalry and undue comparison.

Parenting is like going to school again only this time there is no formal instruction and the daily lessons come in the form of the baby’s developmental milestones.

There is nothing i can do about the life that i have lived under my parents custody, but still i can make a huge difference in the life of the child i have yet to meet.